Before I met The Man Who Would Be Husband, I knew quite a few other high-quality men. The inevitable consequence of not getting married young, and higher education, and moving from one big city to another, and changing jobs a few times, is meeting a lot of new people. Some of those people could have been long-term partners. Before Husband, the highest-quality men I met were either happy where they were (and where I was not happy) or … this sounds so awful … on a different part of the ‘how much I like you’ spectrum than I was.
It’s possible to be very fond of someone, to think they are bright, witty, creative, charming, generally adorable, and sexy … and still not want to commit your future to that person. A while back, I wrote a novella about people who were not at the right stage of life to commit to each other, and who did it anyway. Several years on, I know that those people did not stay together.
It feels mean to break up a fictional couple after writing their love story! But life is life, and not every love story lasts forever. The consequences of that breakup form part of my F/F/M novel UNDERTOW.
Above photo is from my archive. That’s me before I knew what cosplay even was, all dressed up (or down) to go with one of those high-quality men to Dragon Con 1988 in Atlanta. The sword is a functional museum-quality replica and yes, it was heavy! My life would’ve been very different had a full relationship developed with that particular man. He was truly great.